Being Called to the Stake

Okay, so no one's going to tie me to a post and burn me, but my sweat might take out the flames at this point even so -- I've been asked to sing in a quartet for our Stake's conference tonight.

I received an urgent email yesterday from our ward's choir director saying that the soprano voice meant for this had suddenly fallen ill and if I could please please please fill in it'd be wonderful.

I like singing if we're being honest here. I plan on singing to every child I rear because I believe it will help me get through every day a little happier. The only part of singing I don't like is the public part; the one where there's a microphone especially makes me want to hurl. Don't misunderstand, I know that everyone will be so dear and kind about the whole thing tonight. I will receive compliments on overload because that's what Mormons do -- they lift each other and make you feel good about being you. It still makes my feet cold though (which is Mythbusters proven, so yeah).

I've been practicing with Glen because he's better at knowing notes. I just follow the girl next to me, but in this case, there's no other girl singing my part. This has got to be a mistake, amiright?! But here we are a few hours until the thing starts and I'm rumbly in my tumbly and it's not time for something sweet, Pooh... it's time for a bathroom break.

This isn't a big deal if I think about it logically. Most people don't even go to the adult session of stake conference. The men will set up all the chairs going way into the cultural hall, but we all know those are just going to be used for Sunday's session. And like I said before, everyone's going to be super nice about it.

So what is there to worry about?

Wish me luck.

...Lemme just go see that porcelain bowl one last time.

Mormon Monday: Modern World

I've always loved children. Playing fun games and laughing at nothing. Even when I was in high school I'd still bring out the sheets, build a fort and play house with my younger cousins. So, now that my family has begun the next generation it's been awesome getting to know them. My cousin's daughter Jaydyn really likes playing with whoever she can find to boss around (me). When I'm at grandma's house, you can usually find me having a very exclusive tea party, playing hide-and-go-seek, or holding my brother's son Bronson.

On Christmas, Jay and I were sipping tea and eating heavily frosted cupcakes when she said this:

J: "Hey, I've never seen your phone...."
B: "Okay"
J: "Where is it? Can I see it?"
B: "Sure, it's in my coat on Grandma's bed."
Runs to the site and waits for me to get it out.
J: "Ooh! I like your buttons! Can I push 'em?

Glen and I both have dumb phones -- not smart phones. We love them and we love our bill even more ha. This experience with Jay made me feel a little judged and enormously flattered. I don't think she was meaning to pass on either of those, but I'm super glad she did (well, just the flattered part;)).

I realized as she pushed my buttons that she hadn't ever seen my phone because when we're playing... we're really playing. I don't need a device to keep hers or my own attention.

I'm not meaning this to be any sort of failure on any other person's way of playing with theirs or someone else's children. I just want to point out that it doesn't always have to involve those types of things. There are so many other options than scrolling through Facebook to watch other people's lives be so much better than yours in one picture. You do know they're doing the exact same thing and only post when something extravagant happens, right? We feed off of each other like parasites. Oh, Chris went to a party last night... let's do something fun and take pictures too! It's all about the selfie. Post it to instagram or it never happened. I need a pick-me-up, so let me just perk my boobs up and take a selfie for instagram so people I don't actually respect will tell me I'm hot. Yeah, that feeling is going to last.

Call me old-fashioned for actually being with people when I'm with them, I guess, but isn't that how it ought to be? Scrolling through those things takes away from your happiness because life can't be fully captured in a picture or 1,200 -- there will always be something you don't see in them. So, don't assume that other people are so much more happy/exciting/adventurous/pretty/whatever than you. We all chip our nail polish and have Top Ramen sometimes. Go and chip your nail polish and eat Top Ramen because you're actually doing things you love and don't have time to worry about it.

Mormon Monday: Through Another Lens

 Most often we see ourselves in the stark morning light creeping in through just peeled open eyes. We may not be just waking up, it might be just after hours of prepping, cinching, covering, labeling, stuffing, preening. It doesn't matter what season it is in your day, the unforgiving morning light shining from our eyes and the tired glare of looking at the same flawed features is always on; there will always be something to worry over and try to mask.
It's funny then how photographers can capture our "best" qualities in a single half hour shoot or how others can look at those same features we stress over and confess their lust for them. How can strangers see what we cannot? Why must we look at the bad over the good? Why must our bodies be guilty before proven innocent in our own eyes? It is equally mystifying and infallible.
Think to how you are with the ones you love most dearly; there are times when there is no getting past your grumpiness... but only with them. If someone pops in for a visit or calls unexpectedly, in that same instant you transform from an impenetrable grump to the friend filled with kind words and laughter. Weird how most of the time our best selves are saved for those we have least invested in. And how true this is within our own minds and especially within the poorly-lit bathroom mirrors of our homes.
But, as I mentioned, those preconceived flaws of body and person seen through the lens of another become beauty and lust and perfection and magic. Looking through the eyes of others will in every way make us better because whether it be praise or criticism, they can make you stronger. Let those words affect you as much as you want them to because you have control over it. Putting stock into what others say can be good and bad, but controlling how much goes in is up to the cook. Make your soup or casserole or bacon-wrapped-unagi-roll everything you ever dreamed by believing in your ability to do it. We are our own strength, our own love, our own person; let you be you without the morning light and just peeled open eyes of yesterday. See what God sees by believing that he can see more than you; He knows what we can become and what we can become is what matters.

We spend so much time critiquing our reflections that we become confined in one state of mind. Selfishness. We lust after the vain imaginations of perfection and forget that it all fades and your left with either wrinkles from envy or laughter. And wouldn't you rather be laughing for them?

So, instead of focusing on how we see or how others see us, the Lord will have the last word. He knows you, the real one; not the fake one on the phone or in visits with friends, nor even the one in that bleak bathroom mirror. Let Him guide you by never losing yourself to the false perfection of everyone else. He is the light that lifts our eyes and minds from our selfish desires. See yourself through His eyes. He created the earth, the seas, the sunsets, the snow, the waterfalls, and you. Out of all His creations, we are the beauty He is most eager to possess and shouldn't that say more than we ever could?

Aloha Monday

High Five for Friday: Beach Week

Happy day, it's Friday! We plan to have an amazing outing tomorrow, which I'm super stoked about! We've been talking about it for a while and have just never had the time or our brakes weren't working for like a month haha. We thought we could just ride it out until the end possibly, but the car just wouldn't stop sometimes, so we decided to take lil blue in for a check up. Hundreds of dollars later, we can stop again! Success. We're missing a hubcap, but what's that in comparison?

1. Our anniversary was last week Thursday, but we didn't have much time that day to celebrate. So, this is kind of from last week, but it's a big enough occasion to merit expanding into this week's gratefulness too. We went to Ted's for Garlic Shrimp and pie, which was a really good choice. It always is. Here, I kissed my chocolate haupia cream pie and that was a really good choice too.

2. DONOVIN! We stayed with our friends on Saturday, the Richardson's. I've mentioned them a couple times before (here and here). We hadn't seen them in such a long time! It was awesome to be with them again. It's weird how you get so adept to staying in your own area that it seems like such a crazy outing to go across the island (they live in town -- about a mile from Waikiki beach).
Here, Donovin is showing off one of his power stances in the middle of an epic toddler dance to looping music coming from the keyboard behind him (it was "looping" because he kept turning it back on after it had finally stopped haha).

Thanks David and Mandy for letting us take over your living room and feeding us amazing things! We love you guys :) Let's do it again soon, okay? Cool.

3. Like I mentioned in our anniversary post, we hadn't been to a beach in weeks because of work schedules. So, I kind of made up for it (if you can) by going to the beach almost every day this week. Even if it was just for a half hour I made the trip. It was beautiful and lovely and all the good words. This is from Waikiki the night we stayed at the Richardson's. It was a beautiful sunset.

4.  Yoga at the beach is such an awesome experience as long as I'm alone. I don't like when people are there because I feel like I'm either ruining their experience because it's hard not to look at someone while they practice yoga, or I'm ruining my experience by doing poses that are the most discrete. Rough life, I know. It really is a struggle for me though. 

I really was completely alone here. Excepting the two surfers that paddled out to the furthest break (they were like specs), I was not in human contact for hours. Plus, it's a beautiful beach with plenty of cute birds. To spread the icing all over this delicious dessert of a day, I fell asleep in corpse pose next to this patch of grass/weeds. (Glen wasn't here because he teaches all day on Thursdays)

5. I had a conversation with a friend about many things yesterday, but also about just one. We talked about girls, marriage, the temple, remembrance, righteousness; we got a little deep because a lot of the time it's necessary and we're too afraid of drowning to even start it. Even with all of the topics we touched on, we were talking wholly about what he should be doing. It's different for all of us, but we all end up at the same place even though we take our own path. It was a really good conversation and I'm glad I started it.

Hope this next week is even better than this past one.

Aloha Friday!

Mormon Monday: Positivity

The campaign is over and we didn't win. It was an amazing learning experience for me, not only about that strange political world, but about my limits. I think we all tend to think less of ourselves than is necessary. Humility is one thing, negativity is another. I usually think of myself as a slightly capable person; I mean, my extremities work and all of my senses work as far as I'm aware. 

Glen and I had a very serious conversation about this the other night when I was sort of breaking down from the need for sleep. You know what I'm talking about... it was intense and I probably forgot half of it within seconds, yeah. 

He was chastising me for spending so much time on the campaign (it was the final days and the monthly monster was abounding within me, you feel me?) and I was failing to defend my non-existent points because he was right and I knew it. After a bit, I finally just blurted out that all I have to offer is a body to do work; go further than that and you don't find much value. So, I need to be there to do whatever menial tasks necessary because that is all I can give (talk about a pity party).

Honestly, I felt this way in a moment of weakness and Glen felt my sincerity. He held me close and told me all the things I needed. The most remarkable thing about this is that I believed him and continue to. It is no miracle that he whispers wonderful things to me; he's a great husband, but my ability to take the compliments in and accept that his words have feelings and truth attached to them is always a struggle.

The spirit of God is the only explanation I have of how Glen was able to tell me that I meant so much more than a body in the crowd and have me believe it. The words of others can come off as ambiguous, sarcastic, straight up lies; especially when they're directed at you. We tend (at least I do) to trust that no one can be trusted. This kind of philosophy, while oftentimes very useful, is damaging to relationships especially in marriage. Trusting your spouse is crucial to having an open, unified life together. When your spouse (or friend, family member, loved one, etc.) speaks to you and the first thing you think is if they're telling the truth, there are some serious flaws in that thought process. You are establishing a relationship based on a principle (if you can call it a principle) of guilty before proven innocent. If a known murderer gets to go through a trial seen as innocent before proven guilty, who is more deserving of that same kind of treatment than your spouse? 

The spirit lets us feel words, the truth of them. I am so grateful for the late night conversations we have and that I can trust my husband enough to be open with him. It is a blessing I cherish now more than ever (because I trust him now more than ever).

Mormon Monday: Having Fun, Part 1

This is the video I mentioned we made in my last post. Our friend was making a video compilation of a bunch of videos friends made for his wife's birthday and we made this for her! It was fun and a really great way to spend time together. So much of our "together" time right now is being spent campaigning or grading quizzes or sleeping or driving across the island that we don't get to do normal, fun stuff like this. And if I wasn't a member, I'd probably be thinking to myself what a Mormon does for fun because they can't dance, right?

In high school my best friend and I were Mormons; all of our friends knew it, it wasn't a big deal. We didn't drink or do drugs and everyone knew it. This one night in particular, we were at a friend of a friend's house celebrating our friend's birthday party. It was extremely fun and you know why? Jolie (my best friend) and I didn't have inhibitions, no need to drink them out of us.
We set up shop in the garage because it was equipped with couches and Brisk cans all over the floor. We sat down and began our talk show for the night -- this is where the cans come in, they were our microphones. We were extremely bad at the English accents, but no one seemed to mind (or remember). Everyone thought we were just as drunk as the next person, which may have not been the best example, but we were teenagers without testimonies. We were seriously having the best time over anyone, I guarantee it. Everyone else was moaning about some stupid drama here and there, but we were just in our huge dreamland in the one-car garage busting guts all over the place. We got yelled at several times for being too loud and for drinking the Brisk when we were specifically asked not to. Trouble is, we don't drink tea as Mormons and we were probably contracting infectious diseases from the real culprits, so who's got it worse buddy? It was the best party I had ever attended and remains my favorite memory of high school.

The point is, Mormons have fun, just not a lot of the same fun as everyone else. We make dumb videos and go on hikes and play sports every week; and if you grew up with/in a devout Mormon family, you probably still play Settler's of Catan every Monday week night out of habit.

We love having fun. Come to any activity and it's sure to be a hilariously-wholesome, good time with major treat action. It must be that we just have more time to bake and cook and craft because we don't clutter our nights with drinking, not sure though. We wake up and get on our knees, not in front of the toilet for sickness (besides that whole pregnancy deal), but to consecrate our day and dealings to the Master of heaven and earth. We are the way we are because of Him and I love it.

Aloha

High Five for Friday

We just got home from the La'ie Temple... so let's make this quick! Here's my five:

1. We saw Meet The Mormons at the last showing last Saturday. It was a really touching, great film. We really enjoyed it; plus, La'ie Palms Cinemas has thee best popcorn evahh. Let's say it together: real butter. Mmmm. Yeah, it sounds amazing too.

2. Words cannot express the joy and peace that comes to my soul from being at the beach.

3. We took care of my boss's mother-in-law. Everyone calls her Grandma, she loves singing songs about CA (my kind of sing-along partner) and Popcorn Popping. She really made me feel super grateful for the things that I have and remember. She has Alzheimer's and asks you the same questions every 30 seconds. During this picture, she felt really uncomfortable that some weird stranger was trying to take a picture of us. She kept asking me who it was when we had already been sitting with her for about 10 minutes before Glen went outside. Oh, and she eats ice cream... that's it. Go big or go home, you know what I'm saying?

4. We bought some camera stuff and we are way stoked on it! This was taken with a new filter we got that's supposed to be really good for black & white photography. So far, I'm pretty happy with it.

5. We made an awesome video for our friend's birthday. I would show it, but it's still a secret for now. Soon though, very soon. I love it. Anyway, during the filming this beautiful sunset unravelled before our eyes and we just admired it until it was gone. You might think it's fake and I would encourage your doubt because look at it. Some serious nature right there.

Hope your week was filled with goodness too! Also, it's Glen's birthday next Friday... and mine next Sunday... Ah!

Aloha

Mormon Monday: Jalapeño Hands

Everyone already knows this, but let's just explicitly state that I'm a Mormon. It says so in my side panel thing - if you click on it, it takes you to a page where I talk about my experiences and what I believe as a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. Anyway, I did that a while ago and while that's good or whatever, I've been feeling like it isn't enough.

In the Church, we've been counselled to be more open about our lives in social media. Those outside of our religion think we're super weird... which is totally true. There are drive-through coffee shops, entire valleys devoted to wine, more R-rated movies in the listings than not, and we're all over here in this little corner of reality passing around the jell-o and watching The Simpson's when the parents are on their date night. So, yeah, I'm different than most people on this Earth because I try to be a faithful LDS.

Here's a story I shared in church today:

On Saturday, we were helping out my boss  with making food for this farewell party for someone that works for them. The menu called for Cafe Rio's pork and house dressing. Beautiful choice. I was hard at work with the dressing when it came time for the jalapeño to be added to the ingredients in the blender. I was unsure of how good the blender would perform so I decided to break each piece in half again just to be sure. I felt a little spritz each time I broke one in half. The first time it happened, I thought that it probably wasn't a great idea to be getting that stuff all over my hands. I waited a little to see if my hands would start burning and they didn't; I continued. When I tasted the dressing from the blender cap afterwards it was so spicy! Glen tried it and didn't get much spice so I thought mine must have been a fluke.
A little while later, we were leaving because the regular help came and my hands started burning were on FIRE! We planned to head to the beach, but I needed help. We thought about going anyway because there's probably nothing we could really do about it, but decided to consult Google (neither of us have smart phones; read: homeward bound). We stopped at Foodland for milk and eggs -- staples in our diet -- and by the time we were leaving, I couldn't even feel the milk in my hands.
Google said a lot of things that did not work, worked. I was consigning myself to amputation at this point. Alcohol was one of those things, but Glen decided soaking would probably be best. We were pretty low on our Isopropyl, so we turned to vanilla extract.
One thing you must understand is that I am an avid throw away-er. Things that have no purpose, not enough sentiment, anything that I deem throw away-able -- goners. We received this vanilla bottle from some friends leaving the island. We used it once and decided we didn't like the flavor, so it went in the cupboard I least look in. If it had been put in any other place, it would have been trash a year ago. Let me tell you, that stupid, huge bottle of vanilla saved me from a life of handless-ness. I hated that vanilla... it smelled like bubbles too (What the weird?), but it saved me in the end.
Lesson learned: you may feel like that bottle of vanilla sometimes; forgotten, useless, maybe smelly too. You may feel that your life has been spent sitting on the shelf with no worth and that you should just be thrown away. I testify that you, just like that bottle of little worth ended up saving my hands, can save yourself and others by serving. Be the hands that care, the words that uplift, the steps that otherwise could or would not be tread. There is no greater joy than to answer the call of a loving Heavenly Father to help one of His children in need. Whether that be to bear and raise a child, grab the blender on a too-high shelf, or be a friend, service will keep your life worth living.
In the name of Jesus Christ, amen.

I might even keep the rest of the bottle (it's that huge) because it was so nice to me. We'll see.

What being LDS does and doesn't mean is really tough to answer because there will always be more questions that spring from the words I put here than answers given. What will be here every Monday is a portion of my testimony that I feel should be shared. It may not be for you (it may not even be for me sometimes), but I know that I want my posterity to have the opportunity to know my testimony. And that's enough.

Anyway, this is me letting even more of my weirdness shine for all eight of you to see. Joyous, joyous.

Aloha

High Five for Friday: Ideal

While my weeks are always filled with the mundane like work and laundry, there is just so much more that really brings life to my soul. I can already feel this HF4F thing lifting my spirit and love. Every night I think about my day while drifting between awake and asleep and gratitude sweeps over me for all the good that's in my life. I love it.

With that, my high fives for this week:

1. General Conference was awesome. I mean, it usually is, but this time it was just something else. Half-way through, Glen and I were excitedly planning our best reading/re-watching times together. Nerd alert.

2. Oh, and I made this during the viewing (like I said I was going to, oh snap). We're in Halloween territory, people. 2014 is in it's last quarter. Insane!

3. Glen's colleague (hahaha I really wanted to say that for some reason) recommended reading this book. When Glen brought the borrowed book home, I thought to myself why would anyone publish a book telling me how to make an atomic bomb? Also, why would anyone publish a book telling me how to make an atomic bomb!?! I completely forgot about it put a pin in it and shelved it. On a hammock outing, I shoved it in my backpack resolving to at least see what the ingredients were. Upon reading the first page, a swift realization came to me that it was not making, but the making. Words, huh? Anyway, a copy is on its way from Nebraska or something because it's that good.

4. I may have procured a job actually using my degree. I already work for the owner in a different capacity, but he likes me a lot (mostly because I'm Samoan -- we fist bump like every 20 minutes because we have an ancestor in common; it's hilarious) so he wants me to do more stuff for him. Mo' money, mo' money, or something like that.

5. Much of my week has been filled with this... let's just put everything on repeat for a while.

Seriously, if anyone has a repeat button I'm calling upon your good favor to just do me a solid.

Aloha

Thoughts on Words

When I get stressed, I come here. To this place of blank, open space. Where nothing really needs to get done and no one's searching for me. I love this place; it is where I am honest and true to myself -- writing in words I don't speak because of timidness or fear. I used to say what I pleased and do whatever came along, but now all of that stuff seems distant. There are times, albeit far apart and few, where I let go of my words and emotions on an unsuspecting passer-by or crowd. It feels good in the moment and usually fades into quiet remorse.

I think some people would still say I am upfront or blunt or whatever you want to call it, but comparing myself from years passed, I have become quite reserved. Through circumstances which won't be spread across these pages (at least not for now), my leaps have become tip-toes, my demeanor has become sunken, my personality has become suppressed. Excepting my husband and the rare moments I catch myself in unflinching courage of public speech or acts, there is possibly no one I've met since the change who would return the correct answer to how I formerly lived. It is amazing that in a few short years, one person could change into a complete stranger to a former self. It's also completely crazy because it seems like yesterday and forever ago all at the same time.

In a conversation with close friends earlier this year, we were each, in turn, giving one-word personality descriptors of people we were all familiar with -- including one another. It came time for Zach to give one word about me. His first response was one that I felt flattered by, but mostly suspicious of his true thoughts -- "Obedient." His secondary answer (we cheated a lot on the 'one-word' thing) was "to the point" (again with the cheating). He gave explanation of an experience he had in listening to me talk about going to meet someone to sell something to a student. The story's not important really (mainly because I don't remember it), but I distinctly remember feeling that Zach truly knew my personality at that point, or at least part of it. It was an extremely enriching experience for my relationship with not only him, but his family -- wife, Sarah and son, Sawyer. I have trouble with expressing that sort of thing and so they don't know this, but writing enables me to feel comfortable with it and that is how I know it is essential to us all.

People get each other wrong more often than we would like to think we're capable of. The driver who cut it a little too close, the stranger staring from across the room, the group in the corner sniggering and stealing glances; many of these types of situations pass through my mind in the dimmest of lights. Always guilty until proven innocent. Why can't that driver have an emergency to merit cutting me off? Why can't that stranger just be hoping for someone to confide in, but they haven't got courage enough to spit it out? Why can't that group be sniggering at the television screen behind me?
It's because I have issues -- far-reaching types of issues. I am the problem; I look at others as if they live in my world. Which they do... but I live in their world too. We all are here, we all need to get places, tell our stories, laugh it off and get sent back to the earth from which our first parents were formed. If we would just sit down and think of the possible problems, anxieties and troubles of others, we would be happier through it. Anger would not so easily beset us because of perspective. The written word gives extreme perspective! Writing about whatever comes like I'm doing now or about specific experiences -- good and bad. There are times when I think my writing has no influence and, therefore, it's good for nothing. But that thought is always overtaken by the truth: the influence may or may not be reaching to others, but it is reaching to me -- to my issues and fears and weaknesses. And I am worth the effort; we all are.

Writing helps me express feelings; things that my words have a hard time conveying. And so, if you too have a tendency to subdue thoughts, feelings, actions, or whatever it may be, I would try to convince you through my writing that it helps. You can feel at home with yourself through it.

I have tons of words written that no one but I can see. And even though most of what I write is not read by others, having it written is the key. It unlocks freedom from doubts, supposed inadequacies, traps set by enemies who would have me drown in thoughts of unworthiness, and from myself. Not that I am actively trying to bring myself down, but we all have the tendency to judge ourselves harshly.

Aloha to all.

High Five for Friday: Busy, Busy

Aloha! This week, a lot of things fell apart for me and my new job as an executive secretary to a campaign manager here in Hawai'i. Truthfully, it was agonizing to see so many different lines on my to-do list increase into pages of to-do's. It all culminated yesterday afternoon for about five hours. So, my week went extremely slow and super fast all at once. There was no time and too little time because I really just didn't want to deal with any of it and knew that I had to anyway.

Through it all, here are my five "high-fives" from the week that is thankfully behind me now:

1. We unintentionally saw the Blue Angels in Honolulu last Saturday! We were winding down our practice for the flash mob I've been coordinating/co-teaching in town and this crazy noise started shaking the building! That may be an exaggeration, but it was slightly terrifying. We all went outside after the initial fear subsided and gathered in the parking lot to wave stupidly because obviously they look for people in random parking lots squealing excitedly over the experience. Duh.

2. Almost all of that stuff that blew up in my face this week was solved by the sweet, sweet support and service of others! I love the willingness of others to help in times of need even when it costs them time, money and effort! It is extremely humbling to see the answers of prayers come so quickly -- even though it felt like ages while I was stewing in the mess.

3. Today, a flash mob for the campaign I'm working on occurred on the streets of Honolulu and I coordinated it... I couldn't decide whether to throw-up or laugh. Both will probably happen by the end of this freaking campaign and I mean that in the most loving way (I think).

4. I ate escargot today. For real, Glen and I both did. We attended a campaign fundraiser dinner because my boss and his wife couldn't make it and sent us in their stead. It was a fancy place... we're talking four dollar-signs on Yelp, Waikiki shoreline, no choice but valet kind of event. Anyway, we took one of everything, as you do, and this beautiful, dark, creamy hors d'oeuvre went into my mouth dripping in delicious sauce. I told Glen to eat one because it was good. A little while later, a waiter comes around offering escargot to people and I quickly said to myself that's disgusting and turned my back on him. Upon closer inspection, it turned out to be that beautiful, dark, creamy thing I said was good minutes before. I almost threw up and then ate another one.

5. General Conference is this weekend!! That's kind of amazing, right? Half of an entire year has passed since Spring's gathering and I can't believe it yet. I'm sure it'll hit me when I'm 68, but until then, I'm peeing my pants because I don't have enough time to stop for a potty break. Ah.

Have a great General Conference weekend, I'll be making goodies, making Halloween decorations, composing emails, cleaning our apartment and doing laundry while observing because I don't have time to just do one thing. I'll probably make it to the end of this year, there are only a couple doubts :)

And this (again) is from The Lauren Elizabeth's blog.

A hui hou

High Five for Friday: The Beginning

"High Five for Friday" is from The Lauren Elizabeth. It's a really cute blog that I've followed for a while along with her sister's: The Small Things Blog. They're adorable and I'm not sure why I love them so much; I just do haha. It's kind of awkward to love someone I don't actually know... but also cool, I think. It may be that it's just creepy, I can't ever decide. Either way, it's not stopping.

Anyway, HF4F is a list of five things that you're grateful for, looking forward to, excited about, or whatever from the last week. It's a little reminder that what I have is good. It's easy to think there's nothing to be grateful for if you never look back to see it all and how it worked out. This is me trying to do better. And besides that, my weeks have seriously been flying by -- I feel like I need to take a couple seconds to reflect now and again.

1. We haven't been able to go hammocking ('ham mocking' is a suggested spelling correction for this... yeah, that too, I guess) for a while because something mysterious happened to the ropes it came with. Glen looked up what he could make to fix this problem and found whoopie slings! They're amazing and Glen's even more amazing for making them! After, he confessed to loving projects and I confessed to loving that (I think that's a classic category 5 resolution).

2. I successfully taught a ballroom full of people a dance that I was taught only two weeks ago. Mind you, the moves are simple and the music isn't too fast. Still, it's the small stuff and me overcoming my natural desire to go to the back of the room and teach the kids how to really play tag.

3. I started learning French again. I took a beginner's class at FCC like four years ago and I just never went anywhere with it after. I've felt annoyed with it because I've learned parts of several languages (Spanish, French, Marshallese, Hawaiian) and never waded through any of them long enough to actually get by. Hopefully I can change that soon.

4. Since I don't have a regular job, the day of the week is really a mystery to me until it's brought to my attention. I remembered it's Friday by myself this week though! That might not seem like it's worthy of being one of the five things and that might be true.

5. Every Friday night, we go to Seven Brothers to end our date night because I'm currently working for the owner (in a different capacity -- campaign, not restaurant) and he's Samoan. Which isn't obviously translated this way by much of the world, but means we get fed. Whenever, whatever we're doing -- you better believe food is either there or on its way no matter how full you say you are. I enjoy this unforeseen plus to my employment status change a few weeks ago.

And that's that. Life is weird, all the to-dos and forgotten stuff worry my brain almost constantly. I feel like this small list of remembrance of the good will encourage a larger change in my daily attitude.

I love life and sometimes I forget it; I hope this helps.

Aloha Friday!

Gobbledegook.

Life Lesson: As soon as Glen got back from his trip to the Marshall's, it seemed like he hadn't ever left. It's weird how that always seems to happen when people are gone. Bruce left on his mission one day and it felt like he was back the next week in my little world. It's extremely annoying and painful for the first couple of days and then they are home again; God is merciful.
There are harder days than most, but the reunion is so joyful that those pains are swallowed up and never looked back on.
I love that about this life. Pain does not last forever and healing can always be found if you're willing to work for it - internally and externally.

Well, it's been forever; in a nutshell the size of my right foot (large-but-not-as-large-as-the-left kind of thing), here's what's been going on.

Saw some local favorites; meet Rocky.

 Spike Ball! This is actually from last Christmas, that is why we're all in pants except Alex, but he would wear shorts in the Arctic.

 This girl!

We had a great time at home with with our ever-expanding family. Love you all :)
A quick trip home and we're back to the daily grind.

The Zimmerman's

These beautiful people let us stay with them for a whole week because our apartment had flooded while we were away and TVA isn't the most reliable place to live when there are problems with your apartment. We are back in our newly carpeted apartment and will be babysitting that handsome babe for the next few Fridays.

Glen and I are taking a Hawaiian language class together this term and we go on field trips every Thursday. We went to a wee island off the coast of La'ie and had some hair-flipping fun trying to talk in Hawaiian to each other. We collected sea salt from the far side of the island and learned a bunch of beach words. It's a beautiful little bird sanctuary with a gorgeous little bay.

Glen's best round at Keiki's the other day because he wanted to have cool hair photos too :)

This is from Sunday afternoon; we went to the temple grounds to watch the sunset and this one flower was on this one stem. They chop plants to the bone here every other day because things grow so fast, which I usually look at with disdain, but I liked this chop job.

Storm Flossie came and went without much more than a couple hours of rain this morning; all good here. Everything else is as usual for now.

A hui hou.

Tid-Bits From Around the Island.

Cool snail, huh?

Well, the snail is actually huge and disgusting looking to me, but the shell [WOW].

After the monsoon, there were massive areas of sediment wash outs from the mountains...

and our garden! 

It wasn't actually bad at all; I was a bit scared for the little cilantro's though.

All around the island, the sea had channels of brown.

It was pretty cool looking. I can see now how monsoons can just wash away an island.

A little scary thinking about that when you live on the edge of one though.

This is at the Dole Plantation.

The Holland's came to Hawaii for a family vacation and we got to hang out with them for a bit.

Tay and Janae got here a bit early, so they stayed with us.

That's a rainbow back there, but it's kind of hard to see because of the sun being all awesome and bright.

I remember the first day Glen and I got to Hawaii, there was this massive double rainbow

spanning the entire sky [it felt like that anyway].

I had never seen such a thing in my life.

I saw how that double rainbow video was made. Witnessing one in person is kind of magical.

It doesn't matter if other people saw that rainbow that day, I felt like it was for me.

I was in an unfamiliar place with imminent danger from that inescapable sea.

There was so much to do in the very beginning too; I felt trapped.

I was far from busting out in tears, but it made me feel safe because I knew that God cared for me

and would watch over me.

So, here's another. Although not so awesome as the first, still really awesome.

There is a hint of a second one there.

This is from the Holland's sweet suite [ha].

They were staying in the Marriot something something.

It was near Ewa, which is on the Southwestern side, and looked much like Southern California.

The pools were awesome! We are planning on going back there over the break

to see just how cool they are.

This is from the North Shore, it is the first beach we went to when we got here.

Kawela Bay is right next door to Turtle Bay Resort.

This is also the best picture that we got with Tay and Janae with us.

Weird, right? I mean, someone lives with you for a couple of days and you don't

have evidence of it at all?

This is what the sand is like at most of the beaches.

It is astounding sand.

It almost refuses to stick to you if you are dry, but once you get wet

you are sandy for days.

It just sticks.

The La'ie Temple Grounds.

The street that you see here leading up to it is called Hale La'a.

This literally means "sacred house" or "house of the Lord".

I know that the Church of Jesus Christ [Mormon] is the Lord's church.
And I know that this structure in this picture is the house of the Lord
 as the road leading up to it suggests.
I know that a person will come closer to Christ through the teachings of the Book of Mormon.
These things I know because I have tested them.
I did not know just five years ago. I would go to church and participate in activities,
but being physically present, means little else than that.
The change that took place was when I started to read that book.
I did not open it trying to challenge or prove it, I just read.
Having that openness of mind, led me to know that the things the Book of Mormon teaches
are actual events, and the stirring of my soul through those words could not be mistaken.
I know Christ through that book in companionship with the Bible.

To read the Book of Mormon is to read the word of God.

Decisions, Decisions.

While studying for my history class the other day, I realized something.
I don't know how to memorize for very long periods of time.
Which is a real bummer when you get to the testing center to find
you're out of time because the test closed right when you got there.
That is the moment of utter disappointment and crying.
Sure, midterms aren't important eternally, not even major-ally in this case.
But after studying for eight consecutive hours today, I expect to write my several essays
and spend my night worrying about the results I cannot change.
But I suffer at home wondering if I will even remember what I have studied for long enough.

Well, I did remember with another couple hours of studying and took the midterm the next day.
So, hopefully I remembered enough to get a grade that is worth all of that.

On more school thoughts, I was looking over my graduation information and noticed that
I will either have to stay longer than expected at BYU-H, or go on to graduate school.
You see, in some States you must graduate with at least 150 credit hours to qualify
for jobs in the accounting world.
I will graduate with less than 140
(unless I pull off an awesome GPA with more 16+ credit semesters, which is doubted).
So I either stay and get the 150 or go to UH-Manoa for a year and get a Masters in Accountancy.
I would say definitely the Master's dealy, but I want babies.
Everyone here is pregnant. Excluding the ridiculous prices of Hawaii, we're baby-hungry.
I'm not saying it's impossible. I know that  we could do it without a doubt.
It's just the daunting nature of the whole thing that has made me shy away from it.
Worries said, we're leaving it to a greater mind than ours to decide.

Beyond school ,we haven't really been up to much lately.
I know, we are really boring Hawaii residents;
but, more importantly, we are trying our best to be really good students.
Plus, we don't have a waterproof camera and it has been on and off
horrendous rain here, so we'd rather not ruin our camera.

But...
We did get to see The Piano Guys.

They were way cool and made this video while here, which is pretty cool.
Especially since I actually have been to the places.

We also went to our ward farm for a service project a while back.
A centipede crawled on my leg!
I cried later, when Glen and I were alone.
I was so scared; my body was shaking.
I killed it though, so it turned out okay in the end.
The good things that came out of it:
I cleaned up around the farm area and the boys put up a shelter thing for the new tractor.

There are always fat pigs running rampant through the farm.
They eat all of our hard work and trample the rest.
The boys found one and chased it down, getting quite raucous with the situation
and hurting themselves on things they probably would have seen otherwise.
But, they finally got the little guy.

After skinning it and making a fire, we roasted lunch.

Through the farm, the temple looks beautiful.
I love the temple.
It is one of God's most precious gifts to us on Earth.
To go inside and partake of the Spirit that resides in each of the Lord's houses
is to feel the love of God without restraint.

In other news, I am going to be an accounting tutor starting in April/May
because I have been doing well in my classes.

Back to studying, I suppose.
We love you all.

Annoyance, Spirit, and Life.

 Annoyance.

After many hours of strife and struggle, I have my schedule settled.

It may be three weeks into the semester.

But when a school has international students running 3/4 of it,

there isn't much you can do besides

repeat even more slowly the things you've been saying for days.

It is interesting how people listen for specific word cues and

refuse to listen to the full story the first time around.

It would have taken (maybe) 20 minutes to get what they got done in weeks.

This has nothing to do with what I just said. I just like the picture.

It's from our fishing-capade in Haleiwa. We caught two barracuda for the marine biology team.

We also want a boat.

 Spirit.

I do want to say on a happier, inspiring note, we went to a lecture on Thursday.

VISIONEERING
 It's a business/life management lecture series that deals with vision.

We are influenced so heavily by the pictures in our minds.

This is why it is so important to have eternal perspective, seeing your life through
Heavenly Father's eyes.
I know that I can do all, be all, see all because the scriptures say so.
I'm not about to call Nephi or Isaiah a liar.
They told us this stuff so that we can ask for ourselves and gain a personal
testimony of the mysteries of God.
And I know that it is true.

Life.

The Pipe Pro was pretty awesome this past week.
The waves, the waves.
I'm not sure that I can explain them.
The pictures don't do it, so I don't think I can either.
They were HUGE.
I got this picture from the pipe pro website (it shows the wave better than mine does).


If I had a wall of water coming at me like that, I would probably die before it got to me.
We got there at sunset because we went fishing in Haleiwa, so it's hard to see.
But, do you see that bigger than normal surfer out there?
That's a jet ski and it just got dwarfed by that wave!

We made Sopapillas!
If you don't know what that is, I'm sorry.
Look up Diners, Drive-Ins, and Dives when he goes to Flagstaff Arizona.
Salsa Brava is awesome.
We went a couple of summers ago and it was delicious!
So, since we can't go again, we made it at home:)
Kalua pork, beans, cheese, cilantro-lime sauce, and it's deep-fried.

Glen's masterfully slack-lining here at Hukilau.
That's our new, wonderful hammock
courtesy of Uncle Robert and Ashley:)

This is by Shark's cove, so beautiful.
Still weird that there are pine trees right by the water in Hawaii.
I mean, you expect it in other places like Oregon or something, but not here.

We are in the season of extreme low tides.
This area is usually filled with water, but it's gone for half the day now.
That's Chinaman's hat out there.
We went fishing closer to it a while back.

We have school, jobs,  a beautiful island, and love.
Doing pretty good.